Becca 020

Category: Uncategorized

  • Go to Comfort part 2

    Go to Comfort part 2

    In my previous post I mentioned I had two comforts one being books the other is being outside in the open.

    Being outside makes me feel very calm indeed. When I have been inside all day for work I get the feeling of being trapped so, getting to be outside as much possible is a great stress relief. I am very grateful I have a balcony off my flat. Even just by sitting on the balcony helps a great deal of releasing any feeling of being trapped

    The feeling of being outside helps me feel less trapped and closed in. Being outside in the open especially amongst trees soothes me and invigorates my imagination. Being amongst nature and outside allows me to appreciate the world more and feel more like I am whole person and forget that I have Asperger’s Syndrome and how in situations I get so overwhelmed I over react or don’t react.

    Trees, gardens, meadows, woods, forests you name it have this power over me that I never tire of. It’s always quiet and little to no people at all around. I can hear my thoughts. the soft sound of the trees and the way the light filters through when the sun comes out or when it rains and the trees protect you completely or allow small rain drops through and it hits you on the head or face, if you are like me and looking up at the trees to enjoy the view form below.

    Trees do not ask questions but, they somehow seem to prize the bad energy out of me and allow me to reinstate myself to a emotional and mental well being where I feel like I am in control of myself again, which then allows me to process the day in a much easier way than before. Being outside also allows me to feel more in control as I have mentioned before but trees, not only powerful to help the planet as we know it but they are powerful in so many other ways and they so understated by much of the human population.

    Ever since I was a child I have always been an outdoorsy and bookworm. My favourite is sitting under a tree or where there trees to allow me the option if I want to sit underneath one with my book and a blanket and pass away the time. For me this is my ultimate go to move and rejuvenate myself. I as an Aspie am at my most happiest when I am doing this. of course when it has been raining hard it is not possible but then I enjoy a walk and get home and get mega comfy on my sofa wit my book.

    As an adult I have been able to communicate with my family in particular what my trigger points are and what helps me. My family try as much as they can but even they get to a point where they struggle to help which is where an an individual finding my ways to help and making myself do them is so important. The wider circle of people need to be a lot less judgmental and encourage the individual on the spectrum to their calm state in whatever way they can.

  • Go to Comfort part 1

    Go to Comfort part 1

    People on the Autistic Spectrum are all known to have at least one thing they have an obsession with.

    This obsession tends to be the thing that comforts and calms when we get to the point where we need to pull ourselves away from the real world. The real world can be a overwhelming place.

    For me as a Aspie the real world can be daunting, scary and all too much. My go to is books. Libraries, book shops, anywhere where is books I find reassuring. I cannot go anywhere, even the weekly food shop without my book. I know I don’t need it but without it I seem feel a little part of me is not there.

    I am always drawn towards books and have been ever since I learnt to read as a child. I would be dragged along shopping with my mum and sister as a child and I find a seat and be reading my book as the crowds of people I have always found far too much and extremely overwhelming and the shopping aspect a very tedious affair indeed.

    Every week we’d go to the library or bookshop to get me a couple of new books as I would through books at an alarming rate.

    For me books are a comfort for me, for more than one reason.

    Books allow me to travel to another world and time, Books allow me to have time to myself. Books allow me to be anti social as when I have my head buried in most people tend to leave me along which I am grateful for as it allows me to recharge my social battery. Books make me stop, sit down and remember it is good to slow down and unwind and forget about the real world for a short while.

    Books and reading are ONE of my two biggest comforts. I believe people, particularly in first world and developed countries need to stop, slow down and remember what it is to find comfort in something, whether it be an object, place, person or more than one of the things I have just mentioned.

  • Living with Asperger’s Syndrome

    Living with Asperger’s Syndrome

    I am 35 years old and I was diagnosed with Asperger’s Syndrome when I was 10 years old.

    Throughout my life and current day I have always hated big crowds. There have been exemptions to this, Britney Spears concert and west end shows to name a couple. With large crowds I find it all to overwhelming and over stimulating and just all too much. When I am in a big crowd I become withdrawn, quiet and try to find a corner to loiter in to get some comfort of isolating myself away from the crowd.

    I am someone who enjoys being alone and finds comfort in being alone however, in the last couple of years I have found myself having the feeling of loneliness on a frequent basis. I have tried online dating but having Asperger’s have put myself in situations which have been potentially dangerous and caused me mental and emotional distress because I have given myself the following thought processes:

    After the asked myself why did I put myself in that situation it could have turned out much different than it did or it has turned out my physical health paid the price and taken a major toll on my body and made me question myself as a person and what I want. When I have questioned myself on this I have clarification as to what it is but on a couple of occasions found it hard to get myself over the situations or person out of wanting someone in my life but come to my senses that I can do better.

    What I find a lot of people don’t realise or want to accommodate or accept is a lot of what we do and say we genuinely cannot help it. Where I find people not the spectrum where they behave and say things they get away with it, they get pulled into the office by all members of management and get given official warnings for their behaviour, attitudes and actions which in my eyes is very discriminating and bullying towards people on the Autistic Spectrum.

    I have always felt in places I have been left out or I have felt left out because of social situations and cues I do not understand.

    Writing also from experience I do find with so many people not understanding the autistic spectrum or Asperger’s Syndrome they seem to think and/or believe we are stupid people. We have low IQ’s, which is actually the complete opposite. There are situations and social que’s I do not understand but most of them I understand perfectly, if not I understand more and better than people who are NOT neuro-divergent.

  • The Power of Plants

    The Power of Plants

    I live in a flat but I love gardening. Luckily for me my mum has a garden which I can help her with and she is happy for to do so as often or as little as I want.

    I find tending to plants and caring for them to ensure they reach their potential for humans to enjoy the wonders of what the natural world can produce.

    I have houseplants to fill the void of not having a garden. I bought all my houseplants from very small specimens from garden centres and tended to them.

    I have many sprouts coming from 3 of my houseplants that I ned to pot as I want to see them grow and fill m flat with more houseplants and it’s a great satisfaction to nurse them from a sprout from a mature plant and see them develop into their own plant and see sprouts coming from them which has happened to 2 of my cuttings that I planted only earlier in the year.

    Having a south-west facing flat I only get the evening sun flooding through but my plants love my flat and are flourishing I cannot believe how wonderful they are doing.